You’ve been in labor for several hours, hoping and praying for the little one to come out…and finally, after three pushes, you hear your baby’s first cry. You cry too.
They hand over the baby, right on your chest, all slimy and gooey-looking, but it doesn’t matter. You still kiss him anyway.. He searches for your breast and with that first latch you get a rush of mixed emotions. Strange. Painful.. But no, more of an overwhelming sense of fulfillment and a bit of fear … Because it’s just you, your husband and this tiny creature now. This fragile life is now in your hands.
You stare at this baby in amazement, you’re probably exhausted now but it doesn’t matter- you’ve waited nearly 10 months to meet this one!
The doctors now hold your baby and clean him up… You just stop.. stare and maybe glance at your husband thinking.. “We did it!” You close your eyes thinking that this would be the best time to get a little sleep.. But before you know it, your baby is back in your arms. Now, sleep is nearly impossible.
Three hours just passed and it’s time to leave the delivery room. You’re all cleaned up, the baby is too.. They wheel you into your hospital suite – before you know it, the room is silent and immediately, a loud cry! It’s time to feed the baby again… You slightly panic, you’ve still got your IV on – it’s irritating actually.
Then *latch* ouch! He’s probably not latching on right.. Feels sore, like a wound being fiddled with. You try again, slightly better.. But no you just suck in the pain because this little one needs you to.
Burpy time. It’s Daddy’s turn now. A few minutes and the baby is back to sleep. Before you know it another 3 hours and it’s morning- time to feed. Same routine, same story.
Eventually after many many hours, maybe days..the pain is finally gone- breastfeeding becomes like a normal thing- a routine. Every 3 hours.. Stretched to sometimes 4. Feed. Burp. Poop. Sleep. Feed. Burp. Poop. Sleep.
2 months have passed.. Your schedule pretty much revolves around this 3-4 hour window. Sounds overwhelming? But you manage anyway..One day at a time.
No one will ever really understand how much a mother endures ’till they actually become a mother themselves.
It’s amazing how our bodies manage to go through this seemingly stressful time. I mean after all, we just CREATED a human being inside of us! And now this little person is here right next to you…relying on you to keep him alive.
We produce the most nutritious, and the most precious milk that ever existed- we PRODUCE it. How?! Our bodies are so miraculous – we just forget sometimes.
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If you’re a mother for the first time, I know that sometimes you just stop and cry. And that’s okay. Let it out. You are tired and you just need a little break to keep you sane.
If you feel helpless, it’s normal. We all start somewhere. But don’t think you are alone- you have your husband, family and friends around- that’s what they are there for. Call them!
There are so many other moms most likely going through the same thing- nowadays, the online community is just a few clicks away! So many moms whom I’ve never even met have sent me emails, Instagram messages & Tweets about personal things they’ve been going through- and that just goes to show that we all need eachother. Each one has a story to tell – and we learn from it.
This is what Social Media & Blogging is about for me, reaching out and making it so much more meaningful than just plain old fashion, beauty & OOTD’s. Yes they are important too ’cause we need to look our best & take care of ourselves! But it’s not just about that. It’s about making a difference in each others lives and maintaining a balance in everything.
You can do it, Mama!
Keep in touch & feel free to share your thoughts too 🙂
xxMikaela
Photography: The Picture Company @tpcnewbornstories
Thanks for sharing. I am anew mom and my goal before was to breastfeed my baby for 6 months and now he is 7 months and I’m still doing it. It is hard especially here in US because it is just me and my husband and we are both working. I work in ICU which is difficult and stressful. I pump at work but I don’t have the luxury of time because my patients are critical. My milk supply was decreasing (maybe related also to stress coz my brother and father died just 4 months apart this year and of course stress at work and lack of sleep too) and I saw your post about increasing the milk supply. When I went home last month for my father’s funeral I ordered the lactation cookies and bought the malunggay pills which really helped a lot with my milk supply. Thanks!
Hi @rosealvarez thank you for sharing your story! I’m so sorry to hear about your brother and dad 🙁 i can’t imagine all the stress and pain you are going through. May the rest in peace…. But wow what an amazing mama you are!!! All the sacrifice for your little one too…. I’m so glad though that the malunggay and lactation cookies worked for you!! Thanks again for sharing your story. God bless you!
I like your entries mika. So organic and unpretentious. I can relate with the experiences you have cutely narrated and they all hit home to me. Amongst all the things though during the 4th trimester (3mos after giving birth) is the most time I wish I had help around as I would had I given birth and recuperated back home in the Philippines. I live with my husband and two kids ages 4y and 18mos her in nyc. Their first few months and almost one year of life were a blur it went by so fast we weren’t even unable to fully document it due to lack of sleep and need to return to work 3mos post partum. I like the way you put it cos it’s the honest – our babies relying on us to keep them alive! Truth be told me and my husband navigated through the first years of our kids on auto pilot and we thank God everyday that we’ve kept them alive and all by His grace. Thanks for sharing your life!
Hi @felixandjoyce 🙂 Thank you very much! Your words are sooo encouraging, you can’t imagine how much this moves me! And to hear your experiences too and how closely similar they are to mine, reminds me that we really aren’t alone! And yes, all by God’s grace 🙂 Keep in touch! I hope to hear more stories like yours as I go along 🙂
Hi mikaela 😉 i am Susan. To be honest I’m scared but happy at the same time becos after 13yrs. God gave us our second child and she’s a girl we Already have a boy. Nakakatakot kasi its all square be again and malayo Kami sa parents namin (we’re leaving here in Canada) pero thankfull pa rin Ako kasi I am surrounded with my husband and son who can help me out. Paano ba magkaron ng maraming milk? Breastfeeding and formula ang ginagawa ko. I tried to eat everyday ng masasabaw na meal and pump it pero konti pa rin, take note 1month na ang baby ko. Ang konti pa din ang produce na gatas. Willing akong gawin everything para magkaron ng plenty of milk sa breast ko. I hope you can help me.
I loved reading this as a breastfeeding mother! I nominated you for the Liebster Award. Check it out here… https://breastfeedingbistro.com/2016/10/14/liebster-award/
Thank you so much! Enjoyed reading your entries as well ❤️ Keep in touch!!!
Reblogged this on Weekends at Home and commented:
Exactly my feelings, too. 😊